Option of our Obituary

It is a safe bet that most of us are willing to admit our active role in our lives, however, many of us might not accept that we can have the same responsibility in how are remembered after our death. Our choices in life give us the option of our obituary,   I think it will be an interesting exercise to examine how I would write my obituary in active addiction versus how I would write an obituary for myself in recovery.

Active Addiction Obituary

Here lies Ross, a man of mouthfuls of talk but lacking on any real action.  Ross was able to charm himself into the hearts of many but only when they had what he wanted, if the people in his life genuinely needed Ross there his company would be contingent upon Ross’ needs.  When it came time for a genuine human to human connection Ross would emotionally escape in an attempt to avoid exposing any true feelings that might jeopardize his fatal cool.  As his illness progressed Ross increasingly searched for solace in the embrace of an echo chamber which fed a feedback loop into infinity.  Ross was capable of great insight and intelligence but was willing to sacrifice the clarity of mind needed to further cultivate these talents for the comfort of momentary bliss.  He would hardly ever hesitate to avoid manipulating those foolish enough to care for him.  Regardless of who it was in his life Family, friends or romantic partners, Ross was most likely always concerned with getting the outcome he desired from anyone at all most any cost.  Hopefully, in the afterlife, Ross is able to accept the fact that he is not and never will be the center of the universe regardless of what he thinks otherwise.

Ross was capable of great insight and intelligence but was willing to sacrifice the clarity of mind needed to further cultivate these talents for the comfort of momentary bliss.  He would hardly ever hesitate to avoid manipulating those foolish enough to care for him.  Regardless of who it was in his life Family, friends or romantic partners, Ross was most likely always concerned with getting the outcome he desired from anyone at all most any cost.  Hopefully, in the afterlife, Ross is able to accept the fact that he is not and never will be the center of the universe regardless of what he thinks otherwise.

Recovery Obituary

We are gathered here not to mourn the loss of a wonderful but to celebrate his existence.  Ross would not want us wallowing in our loss because we cannot lose what we never possessed.  Today we celebrate a light in the darkness, a friend to the friendless, a hope to the hopeless, a song to the songless, a dreamer, a doer, and a man with an unbridled enthusiasm for life, creativity, love and the world as we know it.  Ross’ true passion in life was to make the insane feel accepted, to make the isolated feel connected, to make the angry at peace and to be the laughter in the face of all that wished to crush our spirits.

Ross was far from perfect but his beauty was in his flaws, not his strengths.  His strengths allowed him to display his weaknesses in such a fashion that it appeared as a living art form with the right set of eyes. One of the secrets of success in Ross’s life was that he applied the concept of alchemy to all his affairs whenever possible. Eventually, with the help of his higher power and those who gravitated towards his authentic perspective, Ross, was able to achieve success in creating the philosopher’s stone. He existed briefly in the land of infinity, surrounded by abundance beyond imagination, but a moment in timelessness stretches limitlessly so although his physical form is no longer present rest assured he is here, in all of us, encouraging us to never give up, to face our fears, to lead ourselves to our dreams, to abandon isolation and to expose our vulnerabilities, so we too may join him in the spaces beyond time.

 

We all possess the option of our obituary, are you content with yours?

 

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0 Comments

  1. Beautifully written! Addictions of any kind are all relative. I suffered for many years of co-dependency living with a narcissist & being an empath. I am learning to do things differently & taking things one day at a time. I recently wrote an obituary for myself. I now look at this differently as well. I am going to go back & write another one using the “co-dependent” person as well. What a difference between the 2. Blessings filled with healing & self Love!

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